Hi moms and dads,
I know how much you love your kids and want to do what’s best for them. I have learned a lot with my three children, ages 16, 14, and 12, and here are a few tips that I hope will help you along your journey.
TIP 1: Don’t read too many parenting books!
When my children were younger, I read loads and loads of books — more parenting books than I can count! Don’t do what I did. They will fill you with expectations that are unrealistic.
I used to get so upset because I would try to do all of the things in the parenting book, and they wouldn’t work because each child is unique and different. What worked for one of my children didn’t work for the other.
Formulas do not work for children. They are awesome in theory. They make us feel like we have some sense of control, but they are not realistic.
TIP 2: Invest in relationship with your children!
I really enjoy spending time with my kids.
The more you invest in relationship with your children, the better relationship you will have, the more confident they will be, and it will give them the inner strength they need to push through the challenges of school, if they struggle with reading, writing, or math, because they will feel loved. They will feel full.
If your children are younger, Gary Chapman has another book called The Five Love Languages of Children.
The Five Love Languages of Teenagers talks about loving children based on the way they are designed. My 14-year-old who has dyslexia loves to play. It really does something good for her when I can play with her and tickle her and giggle and laugh with her.
In The Mission of Motherhood, Sally Clarkson does not give you a formula, but focuses on relationship. Some of her children have learning difficulties, and she had to push through and figure out how to help her own children. Children today often face very different challenges than their parents did at that age.
YOUR CHILD IS A GARDEN
I definitely recommend these two parenting books, but I also recommend that you really just love your children.
Embrace who they are and how they are wired. Let go of expectations. Let go of expecting them to be who you think they should be. Help and encourage them to be who they are, where they are. This will help them to grow and develop and probably to exceed your expectations as they get older!
I hope these parenting tips help you to see your child as a garden that you are nurturing and watering with your love and attention, giving them the opportunity to thrive and grow.
Your child is a garden that you are nurturing and watering with your love and attention, giving them the opportunity to thrive and grow.
Mahogany Murphy has been a Reading Comprehension Coach at The Academy since September 2020. She received the first Coach Award for teaching excellence. Mahogany served as a keynote speaker for a Parent Info Session called “Dyslexia – A Mother’s Journey.” She has also been featured in a special Academy promo video!